The Final Struggle

Hello All! Today was my first day of finals. Can I just say that no matter how much work and studying you put into finals, they never turn out the way you are hoping they will. So here is a piece of advice, if you do not know the material the night before your final, you are not going to know it no matter how much studying you do. Let’s talk real for a little bit. My classes did not as planned this semester. I am not saying that I failed all my classes. I did not. I still have above a 3.0, but I am barely hanging on.

From applying to college to applying for a guide dog to going through the process of getting equipment for college, I have not put the amount of time in that is needed to earn the greatest grades I am capable of. I know that next semester I will need to put in even more work, even more time and come up with a set study plan. So, wish me luck because I know this year is going to be hard, but would school be without a few struggles?

Being a visually impaired student in a catholic all girls high school is no easy task, but it is something that can be done. Hopefully when I am blogging about this same topic again in May, I am doing a little better. I am looking forward to my Honors Anatomy class next semester more than anything. That class is what keeps me going. So please, wish me luck and I am sure with a set study plan I will conquer whatever is in my path.

Along with the all the applications I have yet to turn in, I have struggled with anxiety more than I ever have before. This is kind of a sensitive topic for me because it is so personal, but this blog is all about being real, so here it is. This is the year where I really experienced severe anxiety and depression that I never thought was possible for me because of how positive I try to be. I have gotten news that set me back a few months, but thanks to my 2 therapists, I am thriving right now. I am taking Nausene around the clock to help with my stomach aches caused by anxiety and with some help, I am looking at life more positively and trying to have more patience with what I can’t control. I am the type of person that when they want something done, it needs to be done right then and there, but I am working my hardest to control that. I know that in the future God is calling me to great thing, but great things take a great amount of time.

What I am trying to communicate here is that everyone goes through struggles whether they be physical or mental, we can not disregard anyone’s problems. This year has been the hardest year, but I got into college, I made new friends, I am in the process of getting a guide dog and I have the love of Jesus. No matter what this year of this day or this week throws at you, remember that you are not alone. So many people love and always find someone to talk to because having that someone makes a heck of a difference. I never thought a therapist was right for me. I thought it made me seem weak, but now having 2 I couldn’t love them more. They make such a big difference in my life. Whether it be a therapist or just a great friend, always know that people are there rooting for you.

Finals were hard. Heck, this semester was just flat out hard. But I move one day at a time because of my therapists. I try and look at things as getting done on their own time and take things one day at a time. Just thinking that I only have 2 more finals left is whats keeping me going. I hope that anyone reading this is motivated to finish out their semester hard. Whether you have 2, 4 or even 8 finals, know that I am wishing all of your the best of luck and I know that everyone of you will do amazing.

I would like to apologize in advance if this blog post is not one of my better ones. I just drank a whole medium coffee with 3 cream and 3 sugar. I should preface by saying that I NEVER drink coffee. So everyone have a beautiful and blessed day. You all are worth Gods love and everyone is unique no matter your circumstances. There is only one you!

As always, feel free to leave a comment telling me what you think! Thanks everyone! I absolutely LOVE writing this blog so I hope that you guys love reading it as much as I love writing it!

4 thoughts on “The Final Struggle

  1. Zoe, you never cease to amaze me at how strong yet vulnerable you are. The world is hard enough for those of us who do not have to conquer the hurdles you have. Please stay strong and positive and hold close all of the therapists and family and friends who can help you. God bless you, my sweet friend!

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  2. The world needs more people like you! God will grow you and shape you into his instrument through your challenges, but you will overcome. Not just surviving but thriving! For now enjoy your rest and be renewed over break!

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